Archive for February, 2012

Communication in Christ

Today in class was rather inspiring, I thought. We had a man from Connected Families come and talk in my Family Studies course today. And he was speaking on Discipline and the messages we must focus on in disciplining children. (I am not married and I do not have kids) But I am someone’s child and I am a camp counselor which is, by all intensive purposes, like being a parent to 8 children for about 5 days through out the entire summer. So I have my fair share of experience.

Back to the man in class: He stated something pretty darn profound. He said that punishment is not our main goal. Our main goal (as parents or counselors) is to discipline them in such a way that they see Christ. Whoa have I messed up!
However, if we look at it, that is exactly where all of us go wrong. We are so caught up in the fact they screwed up and in immediate solutions that we forget that it is not about the fact that it is inconvenient that they disobeyed, but that it points to them wanting to be loved. Do we have enough time not just to notice what they did, but who they are becoming to be? Do we love them enough to take time to sit down and point out who God has made them to be, lay out ground rules and what will happen if they do not follow them, and then follow that out? And on top of that do we realize that above all this we must realize that no matter what they do, that Christ is Lord and that their actions should not provoke us? Because we stand firm in Christ.

And truly we could take this out look and apply it to all of our lives: friends, roommates, relatives, that absurd man in the black hummer who almost ran you over.. Think about it. Just because they are our ‘kids’ does not mean we are always right and they are always wrong. If I adopted that attitude with my friends I’d get smacked and I’d deserve it! They are no different, they know when we fail in disrespecting them and then they imitate us!

Here is where I realize I am a counselor and not an adult, but respectfully address the adults who have children and are reading this. I have a few things that have been on my heart that need to be said:

1) never say it is a phase and leave it. The kids that that happens to, they never grow out of that! Now yes hormones hit and girls will only be interested in gossip, kittens and that cute boy (whose name changes every other day!). But that is a phase to teach and speak God’s truth into their lives! Not to be left alone.

2) Live a life that is not contradictory. I know we all struggle with this, but it breaks my heart when campers come and you can tell that their parents are Sunday morning Christians by the way they talk about Christ. They have adopted your faith. And that should be a wake up call that there is an area of sin that is has not been submitted to the Lordship of Christ. I know there are areas in my life that need it and I am sure you have yours. This is not a blaming finger I am pointing, this is a ‘hey, step up your game for the sake of you and your kids’. Because really when it boils down to it, when we are not under the Lordship of Christ, then you can bet those under our care will not be inclined to do so either.

On the up hand, there are books and conferences out there that teach these things so that you who are pulling the age card on me can learn from someone older and wiser, because I know I certainly don’t have all the answers. But our primary mission field as parents (or will be as parents) is our kids. Speak grace to them more than the people at your church, not the other way around.

So thus ends my blog. I have been just itching to write out my thoughts and I finally had a moment! Yes!


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